A Survivor's Journey: Kikki Boinski’s Story

In this powerful episode of Justice Unmasked: Family Court Corruption, Meg and JD dive deep into the harrowing yet inspiring story of Kikki Boinski. From enduring years of domestic violence to navigating the family court system, Kikki’s journey sheds light on the challenges survivors face when the legal system fails to protect them.

Kikki’s story is one of resilience: escaping abuse, battling for her children, and rebuilding her life while confronting devastating health diagnoses. Her experience exposes systemic issues, including the normalization of abuse, parental alienation, and the emotional toll of custody battles.

Join us as we amplify Kikki’s voice, reflect on the lessons her story teaches, and advocate for systemic reform. If you or someone you know has a similar story, visit our Podcast Story Submission Form to share your experience. Together, we can demand change.

Transcript

[Meg]
Welcome to Justice Unmasked: Family Court Corruption, the podcast where we pull back the curtain on the injustices within family courts across the United States. I’m Meg, your host, and I’m here with my co-host, JD, also known as “The Real JD.” Together, we uncover the hidden battles waged in family courtrooms, amplifying the voices of those who have been silenced for too long.

[JD]
Hey, folks! We’re so glad you’ve joined us for another episode. Every story we share is a piece of the larger puzzle that shows how the family court system impacts real lives. Today’s story is no exception—it’s an eye-opening account of resilience, survival, and the ongoing fight for justice.

[Meg]
Today, we’ll delve into the harrowing yet inspiring story of Kikki Boinski. Her journey involves enduring years of domestic violence, fighting for her children, and rebuilding her life after the family court system turned it upside down. It’s a powerful reminder of how systemic failures affect real families.

Before we begin, I want to remind our listeners: if you or someone you know has a story to share, head to our “Podcast Story Submission Form” through the link in our bio. Submitting your story, complete with verified court documents, helps us expose these injustices and advocate for reform.

Let’s get started.

Segment 1: A Troubling Beginning

[Meg]
Kikki’s story begins in 1998 when she was just 26 years old. She had recently moved to Kansas City and was working as a summer camp director at the YMCA. It was during this time that she met her future husband, a man 13 years her senior who already had two children from a previous marriage.

At first glance, their relationship seemed like a fresh start. But even in those early days, warning signs began to emerge.

[JD]
That’s right. Kikki mentioned having panic attacks shortly after they started dating. It’s easy to dismiss those as stress or unrelated issues, but they’re often physical manifestations of deeper emotional concerns—sometimes, your body knows something is wrong before your mind does.

[Meg]
Despite these early signs, Kikki married him a year later. By 2000, they had purchased a home together. What should have been a joyous milestone quickly turned into a nightmare. Kikki’s husband became physically abusive, an act she recalls vividly. It was Halloween night, and she had just returned home from working a second job to help pay for his child’s braces. Instead of gratitude, she was met with rage.

[JD]
It’s horrifying. She described how he broke through a locked door and assaulted her, yet she didn’t call the police. And this detail—choosing not to report the abuse—is something we see far too often in domestic violence cases. Fear, shame, and even societal expectations play a huge role in silencing survivors.

[Meg]
Exactly. Kikki shared how the next day, she confided in a coworker, hoping for advice or support. But instead of encouragement to leave, she was told to stay with her abuser. That kind of advice is damaging, and it highlights how normalized abuse can be in our culture.

Segment 2: A Decade of Struggle

[Meg]
For the next ten years, Kikki lived in a cycle of abuse. Like many survivors, she found herself trapped—emotionally, financially, and psychologically. Her ex-husband controlled many aspects of her life, and she carried the weight of supporting his children while enduring his violent behavior.

[JD]
And let’s not forget how much survivors sacrifice during these years. Kikki used her own savings bonds to help fund their home. She also worked multiple jobs to provide for his child. This shows the emotional and financial investment survivors make, only to be repaid with harm and manipulation.

[Meg]
By 2008, Kikki reached her breaking point and filed for divorce. But even then, her journey was far from over. She continued to live with her ex-husband for financial reasons. This arrangement kept her tethered to a toxic environment.

[JD]
It’s a harsh reality. Leaving an abuser isn’t just about walking out the door—it’s about overcoming systemic and logistical barriers. Survivors often face housing insecurity, financial instability, and custody battles that make leaving feel impossible.

Segment 3: Returning to the Cycle

[Meg]
What’s particularly heartbreaking is that Kikki remarried her ex-husband a few years later. It’s a decision that may seem puzzling to outsiders, but it’s a common phenomenon among abuse survivors.

[JD]
Absolutely. Abusers are often master manipulators. They convince their victims that they’ve changed or that they’re the only person who truly cares about them. For Kikki, the hope of a better future was likely stronger than the fear of repeating the past.

[Meg]
During this second marriage, the danger escalated. Her ex-husband owned multiple guns, which he left unsecured around the house. Kikki described terrifying moments where he would walk around the home with a gun in hand.

[JD]
Let’s pause here. This behavior isn’t just threatening—it’s a form of psychological warfare. The presence of a weapon changes the dynamic entirely, making the victim feel like their life is constantly at risk.

Segment 4: Breaking Free

[Meg]
Kikki’s turning point came when she made the courageous decision to leave for good. While her ex-husband was on a business trip, she moved into a domestic violence shelter called Hope House in Kansas City.

[JD]
Hope House became a lifeline for Kikki. She stayed there for four months, taking parenting classes and rebuilding her independence. She described these courses as being more challenging than her college classes, but they equipped her with the tools to start over.

[Meg]
In 2018, Kikki finalized her divorce. This time, she was determined not to look back. She secured joint custody of her children, but even then, the road ahead was fraught with challenges.

Segment 5: Health Battles and Estrangement

[Meg]
In 2021, Kikki faced another life-altering event: a breast cancer diagnosis. Despite undergoing surgeries to remove the tumor, she chose to focus on her children’s senior year in high school, putting their needs ahead of her own health.

[JD]
And yet, her sacrifices weren’t enough to shield her from alienation. After turning 18, her twins informed her that they could no longer see her—a decision that was clearly influenced by years of manipulation from her ex-husband.

[Meg]
Today, Kikki lives in Portland, Oregon, battling her health issues and the pain of estrangement. She’s turned to holistic treatments and remains determined to heal physically and emotionally.

Segment 6: Reflections and Reform

[Meg]
Kikki’s story shines a light on so many systemic failures: the normalization of abuse, the lack of support for survivors, and the devastating impact of parental alienation. It’s a sobering reminder of why reform in family courts is desperately needed.

[JD]
One major takeaway here is the importance of listening to survivors. When Kikki sought advice from her coworker or tried to protect her children, she was often met with indifference or resistance. That needs to change.

[Meg]
If Kikki’s story resonates with you, or if you have a story of your own, we want to hear from you. Visit the “Podcast Story Submission Form” in our Linktree to share your experience. Your voice matters, and together, we can demand accountability and change.

Closing

[Meg]
Thank you for tuning into Justice Unmasked: Family Court Corruption. Kikki’s journey is a testament to the strength of survivors and the urgent need for systemic reform.

[JD]
Don’t forget to follow us on social media, share this episode, and check out our merch to support the movement. Together, we can fight for justice and change.

[Meg]
Until next time, stay strong, stay united, and keep fighting for what’s right.